Active

Do you ever have those times in your life where there is a "theme"? You hear the same topic at church and on the radio and in your reading and in conversations with friends. I have been having such a theme in my life for the last couple of months. In a previous blog I wrote about what God was teaching me about being prepared so that I can regularly meet with Him. I have also shared with you about a book I have been struggling to read by Sally Clarkson, "Dancing With My Father." This morning all of these "coincidental" topics came together in a very real and tangible way.

I am at the tail end of the Clarkson book. A book that I would normally breeze through has taken me along a long winding road. Much like the road little Christian took in "Pilgrim's Progress." Some parts were easy to walk on, some parts I had to work on and other parts I had to sit by the road and rest - digesting all of the contents. I have been distracted by the very things that needed to be transformed. Condemnation, self-destruction, fatigue, hopelessness, faithlessness..... basically everything that was the antithesis of joy. For some reason, I had it in my head that joy looked like a cheerleader. If I really had joy I would be bubbly and smiley and always cheerful. But too often I find myself grumbling and with a sour look on my face. This can't be what God had in store for me.

And so this morning as I am piecing together all the ways this concept of joy has been presented to me, I realized that there is one important area that I have to grab hold of if I am ever going to live a life of joy. I must join my Father in the dance!

If I were at a gala or ballroom event I would spend a lot of time preparing myself for the main event. I would bathe and put on sweet smelling perfume. I would specifically choose my garments and shoes. I would spend time on my appearance and hair. I would grab the right accessories. I would make sure I knew how to dance. I would be prepared.

Not only do I need to be prepared, I must be willing to participate! Why would I dress for the ball and never join in and go out on the dance floor? That would be silly. Yet many times I have chosen to sit in my garments of righteousness, fitted with the shoes of the gospel and the knowledge of Christ and never allow my loving Father to take my hand and lead me out to the dance floor. I was afraid I would fall or look like the fool. I was afraid I didn't look good enough or others would laugh. The truth is that my Father is brilliant enough for the both of us. And the only opinion and approval I need is His. And He has given me everything I need to join Him in this dance.

There is so much more I am learning but the one theme that continues to come to my mind is that I am to be active. The Christian walk is not one of passivity. I am to put on the armor of God, I am to pray continually, seek God first, run the race, compete for the prize, turn away from evil, pursue righteousness.... when I am active in all these things, joy will well up inside of me and overflow out of His grace and mercy. I won't need to look like the Christian cheerleader I once envisioned. I will look like the daughter of the King- content, joyful, at peace and free.

There are so many more tidbits that I have gleaned from this book. I couldn't possibly share them all nor would I want to. You need to walk that road yourself and see how God speaks to you. But I would definitely recommend this book. In fact, I have already given a couple of copies to my friends. So many women are struggling right now. Consider buying one copy for yourself and one for a friend so that you can join each other on this journey to finding true and lasting joy.

Preparadeness

God has been challenging me lately to be more disciplined in my Christian walk. There have been seasons in my life when my quiet times were during the late night hours and that served me well. When little ones came along, my quiet times were in the afternoon during "nap time." Within the last month I have been feeling God urging me to meet Him in the morning. I am not an early riser and certainly God knows this. Regardless, I set my heart to try.

After stumbling to find my Bible and journal and then getting my eyes adjusted to the light, I would try to shake my mental facilities to wake up but it never really worked. I would either read and have no semblance of meeting with God, forget everything I read or even fall asleep with my face in my Bible till the kids woke me up. I have also tried to set my quiet time necessities next to the bed so I could just move it onto the bed and then read ..... doesn't work. Next I set everything by the dining room table and would awaken out of my slumber and shuffle off to the table and try to commune with God. I was getting into a good routine and feeling somewhat successful but still feeling like I could do better.

One morning as I awoke and was feeling extra groggy because of the late night hours I had kept, I questioned God about why we had to meet so early? Doesn't He see that I am tired? As quick as lightning, God showed me the missing piece: Preparedness. I was not preparing myself to meet with God. It wasn't just about getting up early, it was also about making sure I was physically able to do so. Those preparations would have to happen the night before. How could I possibly expect to wake up early when I stay up so late!? Time for this night owl to adapt a new behavior.

So I have set it in my mind and heart to go to bed earlier so that I can meet with my God in the morning before the kids wake up. So far, the first week has been successful. I am really enjoying being awake when I sit down with my Bible and journal and hot tea. All I needed was some discipline and preparation. Not a bad exchange when it means I get to meet with the God of the universe, the God who so deeply loves me that He sent His Son to be my payment for sin.

Finding joy

Shame on me for not writing sooner. This month has been quite the roller coaster. From extreme tension headaches to the pure delight of having little people around. I am still trudging through my book, Dancing with My Father by Sally Clarkson. And it is still a slow journey as God reveals to me how much I take for granted and how much I choose not to be joyful. OUCH!

I was talking to some of the moms at my homeschool group and found out that I am not alone. isn't it like Satan to make us think we are the only ones who suffer and cannot find joy? It turns out that we women really struggle with finding joy. Regardless of whether you stay at home or work full time or go to school. Joy, true joy, is elusive to us. Why is that? Why are we trudging along when we, who believe in Jesus Christ, have become heirs to the throne of God? The Bible calls us righteous, a royal priesthood, a chosen people and yet we spend our days like a herd of Eeyores.

I don't know what the reason is for you but I am certainly seeing things anew as I read through this book. I am finding the nooks and crannies of where my thinking has gone askew. Areas that I have not let God cleanse and just plain choosing not to choose joy. I am about halfway through the book and continue to be challenged. I have recommended this book as a great summer read to my homeschool book and I would challenge you all too. Spend your summer reclaiming the joy God intended for you. It will be so worth it. Join me in choosing joy.

Hired Hand

Dustin and I recently began a course through Financial Peace University. While we are in class, the kids are next door being cared for by one of their friend's grandma and our regular babysitter. We did not know that they would actually have some "schooling" which is a great surprise. The first night they heard about the Bible story where Jesus says He is the Good Shepherd and not like a hired hand who runs away at the first sight of danger.

The next day, Naomi asked me if Daddy is like the good shepherd because he protects and provides for us. I agreed that that would be a correct analogy as long as we remember that Jesus is the BEST protector and provider we have. And then she asked, "Does that make you the hired hand?" I was a little appalled at the thought but I kept my cool and said, "Well, do I run away from danger like a hired hand would or do I have another role?" She paused for a moment and said, "I know! You're the sheep dog!"

"Why is that?" I inquired. She quickly retorted, "Because you are the shepherd's helper!"

If only we adults could get this straight as easily as kids do. Sheep dogs are no less important in the workings of a ranch or sheep fold and yet they do not go around barking incessantly about being demoralized or undervalued. They do their part and take joy in their work. May I be a like a joyful sheep dog as I endeavor to work hard for my family and be a good helper to my husband.

Torchlighters

This year I have been teaching a class at Groups about Famous Missionaries. We have studied George Mueller, Gladys Alyward, Adoniram Judson, Hudson Taylor, David Livingstone, Amy Carmichael, Samuel Morris, William and Catherine Booth and William Tyndale. All in all they represent 4 continents and at least 3 new translations of the Good News.

As a way to "spice" up the class, I recently purchased a couple of Torchlighters videos to share in class. I didn't quite know what to expect but they came highly recommended. I just watched the video on Gladys Alyward and I am floored. The video was a great representation of her life and the way God used her. It truly brought me to tears.

I also watched the William Tyndale version and that too was excellent. But since it shows him being burnt at the stake for his faith, I would highly suggest only allowing children older then 10 to view it. It seems per prosperous to think of "the church" not wanting the common man to read the Bible for himself. How grateful I am to have the word of God available at all times. And to see the sacrifice it took for me to be free to read and allow the Holy Spirit to interpret it was eye opening.

I am amazed at the way people like Alyward and Tyndale have lived their lives. They are people who took God at His word and trusted Him with everything; even their own lives.

Where did it go?

I wrote a blog last week and now I cannot find it. Weird. I have no idea what it was about so I couldn't retype it if I tried. So I will just try to write a brief overview of our last two weeks.

Funny how I can't seem to remember anything that happened now that I have time to sit down and write. I will tell you that I have been wrestling with many things. We are not the type of rush around, go get 'em, schedule everything really tight kind of people. We like to take our time. We are the kind of family that will finish dinner and sit and talk for about 30-60 minutes after. We don't like to be on the road alot and we certainly don't like rushing from one event to the next. With that in mind, we have been rushing around on Wednesday nights trying to be involved in our area of ministry. But it just wasn't working for us. Dustin and I were both frustrated at the rush rushing and the kids were quite tired and exhausted when it was all said and done. So my very wise husband asked me to take a break and stay home with the kids on Wednesday night. We used to have tea parties and read books before there was a children's ministry so we will go back to that. I got a great book on character building that I will be using on those nights. Dustin will be able to enjoy the whole meeting for the men and the kids will go to bed at a decent time. I think it will be a win-win situation. In the Fall we will reconsider our options and try again.

The kids will be beginning their new curriculum next week. We have already started on some of the books but it won't officially start till next week. I have decided to go a different route this year. While we will be having the same "subjects" I will be approaching them differently according to the strengths of the kids. I will use a Charlotte Mason approach for Josiah and a classical Dorothy Sayers approach for Naomi. I am excited to be choosing my own curriculum for them.

I recently hurt my neck moving furniture. I was wanting to surprise my husband.... guess I did big time. In any case, I hope to go to the chiropractor tomorrow and feel better. For right now I am hurting so I will bid you all farewell. I had wanted to write about the great books I am reading but that will have to wait.

Snapshot of this week....

I have spent the last two weeks in a place I call the Curriculum Vortex. Praying, reading, researching and deciding on what curriculum we should use for the next year. Our school year is not the normal Sept.-May so that is why I am looking at those things now. It has been particularly hard this year as I am moving in a new direction. I will be teaching Josiah in a Charlotte Mason method using living books and things and a more logical, classical approach for Naomi. I have polar opposites with these two sweeties. Josiah is my right brain creative, sensitive guy and Naomi is my logical, left-brain, no nonsense, just the facts girl. So while they will have the same subjects, the approach will be considerably different. I found some items on eBay and the rest I ordered from Rainbow Resources. Looks like I am all set for the remainder of this calendar year and I cannot wait to get started.

Last weekend Dustin went on his annual missions trip to the Las Vegas Motor Speedway. He had a great time serving but was exhausted when he got home. I have such respect for military and public service wives. Every time Dustin is gone for a couple of days, I am reminded at the heavy burden those wives carry to support their husbands. I do not think I could do it. My hat is off to them.

This week will end in us celebrating our 11th wedding anniversary. We have been reflecting and praising God for taking these two wretchedly selfish people and creating a beautiful relationship. I can't get out of my head the quote - What if God didn't give us marriage to makes us happy but to make us holy? I would definitely say that is true. In the short time that we have been married I have seen Christ more through my husband than 25 years of being involved in a church. He daily out serves me and never seeks recognition or applause. That is not to say that we do not have our issues or that he succeeds everyday in those things. But when he does, I no longer see my earthly husband but my heavenly groom through him. I thank God for giving me such a wonderful husband. I thank God for spurring me on through my husband. And I am looking forward to the next decade as we continue to grow in the Word and Spirit together.